Monster Mash

The best horror movies to watch pre sex.

If there’s one thing we absolutely love doing around Halloween it’s watching scary movies. Don’t believe us? Just take the ‘Demand It’ campaign ran by Paranormal Activity back in 2009. Originally only airing in a select few cinemas, the Paranormal Activity crew showed some audience reactions to their movie and then urged movie-goers to demand that the film be played in their local cinema.

The result? A viral marketing campaign that helped generate over $100 million for the movie and practically guarantee the franchise potential or what is now a long-standing Halloween series. And ever since we’ve been watching movies we’ve also been using them as a subtle way to either signal a desire to fuck or as a fully intended pre-fuck activity (Netflix and chill, anyone?)

Given these two facts, it’s pretty much a given that Halloween is the time of scary movies and sex. I mean, it’s basically an unwritten rule.

Why Do We Like Fucking Post-Frankenstein?

The link between horror movies and sex does not, to our knowledge, have any scientific studies to verify or explain it, but, let’s face it – we all know it’s a thing.

Horror movie date night has become such a Halloween tradition that it’s even featured in multiple horror movies and other forms of media (Scream, for example, of Michael Jackson’s iconic Thriller music video). But just why do we love mixing these two so much?

Part of it is undoubtedly down to the general ambience that a good movie date-night can provide. Get any situation where you and your lover/s can take the chance to turn down the lights, relax, and snuggle up together and you’re in for a good time.

But why horror? Why not a romance movie or (if you want our recommendation) a good old fashioned porno? Well, this has to do with the fear factor.

Horror movies are, fundamentally, intended to horrify their viewer in some way. This means that a good horror movie will most likely have at least one of you seeking refuge at some point: hiding on each other’s chest or hugging close for that additional comfort and reassurance.

This is also a great time for partners to display just how protective and brave they can be, which appeals to us on a primal sense. Add to that the fact that horror movies get the blood pumping, the heart pounding, and facilitate an atmosphere of thrills and sheer terrified delight and you’ve got the perfect energy to redirect towards sexual activities.

But what movies work best to utilize all of these factors? What’s the flick that practically guarantees a good fucking time (quite literally) and which ones are better to avoid? We have our own thoughts on this.

The Classic Creature Feature

This article isn’t called ‘Monster Mash’ for no reason.

Sometimes the best horror movies out there are the classics: Either a good old fashioned Frankenstein, Dracula, or similar or more modern classics such as An American Werewolf in London. These allow you to enjoy a really enjoyable movie-viewing experience and give you a few frights but, chances are, the effects will be dated enough that neither one of you will be too scared to go to feel sexy come the end of it.

Classic movies also tend to make great discussion points, meaning you can talk to each other during the film (if you want) and bond more over how much things have changed in cinema.

The Horror Romance

Some horror movies aren’t just made to be spooktacular – they also dip their toes in the romance genre, allowing you to enjoy the best of both worlds. The benefits of picking a really good horror romance are obvious: Get the scares when needed to allow for those ‘hide-and-hug’ moments, but also get those tender moments that warm the heart and heighten desire.

The obvious choice here is Twilight (sorry folks) but, if you find the idea of watching Edward Cullen about as appealing as being a slasher victim, then you could always go full hybrid mode and watch a horror-romance-comedy such as Warm Bodies. This zombie-based love story takes stabs at zombies, Twilight, and Romeo and Juliet. What’s not to love about that?

The Horror Comedy

Speaking to horror-comedy, these movies are a brilliant one to enjoy pre-sex if you’re both big horror fans but also want some laughs with your scares. Picks like Scary Movie or Jessica’s Body even add in some adult humour and sex appeal, which might allow you to engage in your own innuendos.

Really great horror-comedies, such as The Cabin In The Woods or Tucker and Dale vs. Evil, are considered to be movie masterpieces in their own regards and will likely leave you in high-spirits come the end of them. With thrills, laughs, and a general mood boost, the horror-comedy is a great movie choice to get you both primed for some after film fucking.

The Genuinely Scary Movie

As you can see, easing the tension of a horror movie is a great way to mitigate any mood-killing moments, but you might find that it’s not the right approach for you. You or your partner might be hardcore horror buffs and just want to be scared out of your pants – figuratively and literally.

If this is the case then things get a bit trickier in terms of recommendations. Everyone has their own idea of what scares them: With some preferring the classic jump scare approach (The Conjuring, Ouija: Origin of Evil) and others preferring a much more psychological affair (Get Out, It Follows).

Films To Avoid

While preferences will have a say here too, we think it’s best to avoid horror movies that focus on body horror (Saw) or disturbing ideas (The Human Centipede) for obvious reasons. It’s hard to get aroused when you’ve been watching nothing but blood, gore and torture for the past two hours or so.

It’s also wise to avoid home invasion films where possible. Hush and You’re Next are great for regular horror movie viewing, but you don’t want to be mid-fuck and then get distracted or scared by the random noises that your house naturally makes.

Extremely depressing horror movies are best avoided too. Give films like The Mist a miss and steer clear of Eden Lake. You’ll thank us for it later.

So There You have It!

Behold, for your fucking pleasure, the best horror suggestions that we can personally muster (and a few to avoid too). Horror is often considered to be one of the most diverse genres out there, so take full advantage of that this Halloween season and find the perfect film for you and your partner/s pre-fuck.

Oh, and watch Trick R Treat at some point. You owe it to yourselves.