What he finds sexy vs. what she finds sexy
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What he finds sexy vs. what she finds sexy

By Janna, 29.07.2024

Men and women differ considerably when it comes to what arouses them. Many things that are attractive to men, do not have the same effect on women and vice versa. Here are three generalizations that sum this up well …

Visual stimuli vs. emotional stimuli

Most men get aroused visually. This explains the popularity of porn among men. On the other hand, women get aroused more by how they feel and by their imagination. This is why books like 50 Shades of Grey and romantic novels are so popular among women. While men can get aroused simply by seeing something visually appealing, a woman often needs more context and emotional stimulation.

Outfits and attraction

Almost all men are ready for action if they see a woman in sexy lingerie and high heels, even if they’ve never met her before. This works differently for women. An anonymous man in a thong won’t have the same effect and can even chase her away, no matter how handsome he is. Put this man in a well-cut suit, however, and chances are considerable that she will yield. With women, it’s all about context and presentation.

Behavior and attitude

Many men get aroused by a giggling bimbo who laughs at all his jokes and is too direct. But nothing turns women off more than a giggling douchebag who is too pushy … that just comes across as creepy. Women are often attracted to confident, respectful men who know how to carry a conversation without being too pushy.

How do you use these differences to your advantage

As is shown by these examples, there are clear differences between what arouses men and women. This knowledge can help you understand how to turn on a woman. And these tips can be much more important than other things that are often popular among men, like lasting longer in bed.

Arousal in men

Men are often turned on by:

  1. Seeing something appealing
  2. Hearing something arousing
  3. Thinking of something sexual

And then they are ready for action. It’s often as simple as that.

Arousal in women

This process is more complicated for women:

  1. Taking away inhibitions: first, obstacles like stress, hormonal problems, shame, feelings of guilt and feelings of unattractiveness have to be taken away.
  2. Building arousal: next, they experience something that turns them on, like romantic gestures, considerate attention, sexy memories, a bath, candles, erotica, massage, kissing or getting a little tipsy.
  3. Ready for action: finally, they are ready for action and want to have sex.

So, it usually takes several steps for women to let go completely, get aroused and enjoy great sex with their partner. By understanding and respecting these steps, men can be more responsive to their partner’s needs and give her an unforgettable experience.

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