Sex tips: 7 Things You Shouldn’t Do During Sex
Seven may be some people’s lucky number but if you do any of these seven things then you likely won’t be ‘getting lucky’ in any way, shape, or form.
On the contrary, today we’re going to look at seven different things that you definitely shouldn’t do during sex.
Let’s dive straight in our sex tips.
#1 Not Giving Any Warm Up
Sex is somewhat like cooking – in order to get the most delicious results possible you need to give the oven time to pre-heat.
Our bodies may be amazing but they also come with their own ‘pre-heat’ function, one that is millions of years old and not worth neglecting.
If you try and engage with a partner without giving them the care, attention and ‘foreplay’ that is necessary then you’ll be short changing them *and* yourself.
Need some inspiration on foreplay? Make sure to check out this how-to video.
#2 Neglecting Personal Hygiene
No, we’re not talking shaving preferences here.
Basic levels of personal hygiene are important for successful sexual interactions, not just because it stops you being interrupted mid-session by a partner who really needs you to wash a questionably scented area but also to help prevent the spread of infections or harmful bacteria.
Washing your hands is a bare essential in terms of sexual etiquette, especially if you plan to have hand-to-genital contact.
Nobody wants to be responsible for making a play partner ill.
#3 Being Flippant With Safe Sex Barriers
Equally, if you’re with someone who values safer sex barriers then you sure as all heck better be respectful of their choices and use barriers responsibly.
Never try to disregard a person’s needs or desire for safer sex barriers; these are things that, much liking giving sex its due time, helps benefit you as well as them.
Oh, and do be sure to replace and alternate barriers if using multiple toys or play methods that require it. A responsible play mate is a caring play mate.
#4 Inflicting Pain Without Consent
Fifty Shades might have convinced you that a firm spanking is a good idea but unless you’re playmate agrees in advance don’t you dare even think of making hand-to-booty contact.
Pain in sex can be exceptionally fun, a good rush, and a nice introduction to BDSM but these are things which should be discussed before a sex session and not just randomly implemented during.
Doing so could lead to some very distressing or potentially triggering moments for your play mate/s and, even if it doesn’t, it’s a massive breach of trust and boundaries.
Always ask first, bite later.
#5 Going For a Long/Short Session Without Forewarning
Sometimes we cannot help how long or short a session is and that’s fine – we work around what our bodies give us. However, if you’re fancying a quickie or a super long session then it pays to make sure you playmate has the time and/or inclination to go for the same duration.
Quickly or long
Come too quickly and without notice and suddenly you’re left with a play mate that feels unsatisfied and a bit annoyed that you’ve prioritised your pleasure needs first. Go for too long and you’ll have an equally miffed partner who might also be bored to tears by the grinding interaction between you.
To avoid a slowly/quickly brewing resentment among you just discuss what you both fancy in advance. Communication really is key.
#6 Negatively Commenting On Their Look/Technique
Okay, so maybe something that your playmate did wasn’t quite to your taste. If so then steer play in a different direction but never begin to harshly criticise or insult them for it mid-session. Doing so isn’t just disrespectful in terms of approach but also completely kills the mood for both of you.
Equally, insulting a partner’s appearance is never okay and shouldn’t be something that you make a habit of doing. You never know what deep seated insecurities you could be touching on (or what new ones you might form) so have some respect, be nice, and play nice.
#7 Pressuring Them In To An Action
You might really want to do something and that’s okay, we all have our ‘yums,’ as it were. What’s not okay, however, is suddenly springing it on someone during sex and then trying to pressure them to follow through in the moment.
Sex is a very vulnerable time. Because of that it’s also a time where we need to show extreme respect to each other. Neglect that respect by trying to pray on a person’s vulnerability and desire to please and you’ll only be harming that person and the relationship in the long run.
We’d like to think that you don’t want to emotionally harm anyone during sex so do yourself and your partner/s a favour and ask about any sexual desires well in advance of even approaching the bedroom.
This is especially the case if you’re looking to include fetish-based actions which might require more research, logistical considerations, and mental preparation.
As with all things, be kind.
So There You Have It!
Sex is a wonderful thing but only if you approach it with the care, consideration, and communication that all involved deserve.
Fail to do so and you might just fail to do anything, or seriously damage your chances of having long-term sexual success.
Goodluck with our sex tips!