Toys during sex: how to easily include them

Let’s be honest. For many women, penetration alone isn’t always enough. The workings of the body are a bit more complex. More stimulation often means more pleasure. A toy during sex can easily fix that. As you progress, it adds extra stimulation exactly where it’s needed. Sensation builds, everything comes together and what was already pleasurable, suddenly becomes heavenly.

Why extra stimulation works so well

During penetration, the body is already turned on. Warm. Sensitive. Aroused. So extra stimulation can make all the difference here, and for many women an orgasm suddenly feels closer. Everything’s happening simultaneously which doesn’t just make it more intense, but also easier to genuinely enjoy it.

Make it part of the whole

Use the toy where it feels logical. Let it join the movement that’s already there. Keep touching, observing and responding. It can also be good to alternate who controls the toy. Sometimes one person takes over, sometimes the other. Which role feels best, is often related to the position and who has more freedom of movement in the moment.

Choose a comfortable and convenient position 

Not every position is suitable for extra stimulation. If you have easy access while you both keep going, it works. If you have to think and reposition, it’ll probably only interrupt the flow.

Positions where the woman has control are often the most comfortable. Doggy is a good example. Penetration continues and she can press the toy against her clit from underneath. She controls the pace, pressure and the moment, which makes it more direct and more intense.

Positions where you lie sideways or one of you sits, often provide plenty of space too. Your hands are free, the rhythm is stable and the toy can easily be included. Sometimes, all it takes is a small twist of the hips to reach the perfect angle.

Which toy works best

Not every toy is convenient during sex. The simpler, the better. A small vibrator is often ideal. Finger-format toys are extra good because they’re light and can easily be positioned, even if you have to fiddle around every now and then. Don’t go for a toy where you have to search for the right button. The simpler, the better.

Alternate and feel what works

A toy doesn’t have to be on all the time. It’s the variety that makes it exciting. Use it for a short while, then stop again. Sometimes that short extra stimulation is just enough. 

So no, you don’t have to read the manual or do a test round first. If the toy is easy to use, you’re good. And if not, just put it away. After all, sex isn’t an exam. It can also just be fun.